Frugality is not an attractive word. It
sounds like a hybrid of "frump" and "legality," like
a distasteful old aunt who admonishes us to live in a dreary state
of barest subsistence.
If you can get past her unprepossessing appearance, however Frugality
can be a Goddess of Abundance. Think of rosebushes: a good gardener
cuts them back regularly and with care, creating form and beauty, healthy
canes and renewed vigor. An unpruned rosebush becomes a tangle, cheating
itself of air and light, prone to disease and producing smaller blooms.
Cutting back in certain areas of your life, with thought and precision,
can allow you to flourish as you never have before.
Getting Started:
Winter is the best time for pruning roses, while the canes are dormant.
The New Year is also our time for resolutions, a time for cutting
back unhelpful life patterns and allowing wholesome new ones to develop.
January is named for the god Janus, who looks with one face to the
future and one to the past. Take this opportunity, as you stand at
the threshold, to look back at the past year and then to the unwritten
days ahead; ready yourself to inscribe the fresh pages with the flourishes
that record a the a life lived to the fullest.
Money Matters:
Many of us overindulge during the holidays, and that generally includes
overspending. Your bank statement or credit card statement may send
you into shock. Cutting back on your expenses for a while can help
pay off that holiday debt, and can also enhance the quality of your
life. How? We’ll get to that. First, you need to start keeping
tabs on what you spend. For one month, take a little notebook with
you and write down every purchase. Everything: include bills paid,
and that non-fat gingerbread latte. I had a CPA tell me with great
authority that fixed expenses only significant component of a household
budget: car payments, rent, and so on. Who am I to argue with a CPA?
Secretly, though, I knew that dinners and cocktails out on the town,
plus impulsive shoe purchases were responsible for my deficit. Carrying
the little log around proved this to be true, and I was also surprised
how much money I was spending on snacks and lunches during the workday.
Once you’ve identified your own Achilles heel, make an effort
to curb it. Packing lunches and snacks will probably be more nutritious
and can save quite a bit of money, so treat yourself to a fun lunchbox.
Instead of going out to the movies, rent a DVD and make your own
popcorn. Do you really need that purse, those concert tickets, the
Vegas weekend? Take a walk through your neighborhood, take a run
through the park, take a hike up your hill. Take a sketch pad and
pencils and try drawing what you see. Take stock of all the good
things in your life and ask yourself: how much more do I really need
to be content? Take a trip to an orphanage or a soup kitchen, for
perspective. Volunteer. Forget yourself for a while, and spend your
energy and love helping others, rather than spending cash on things
to fill your house.
Circle of Friends:
It’s good to give of yourself, but you shouldn’t give to
the point of exhaustion. There are those who return your attention
with equal generosity, those friends you can count on always. There
are those who may not have the strength or resources to give much back,
but who deeply need and appreciate your help. Then there are those
bottomless pits of need, individuals who drain you with every conversation.
Do you have some of those? Do they ever call to see how you are, or
only when they need something, perhaps an audience for the latest self-generated
crisis? Consider pruning out some relationships which are sucking the
vitality out of your life. Dead and diseased canes have to be removed
from a rose bush, or the entire plant will lose vigor, attract pests,
and fail to bloom well. Don’t let this happen to you. It may
be time to make some judicious cuts in your social circle. Think about
the people you are in touch with regularly. Do those connections bring
you joy? If not, why are you maintaining them? Think about the people
who have known whose names bring a smile to your face. Are there people
you have loved immediately, fully? Are there those with whom you have
felt most yourself, totally at ease? Have you been in touch with them
lately? If not, look them up. Send an e-mail, or a letter, or pick
up the phone. Try to bring more of those solid, enriching relationships
into your daily life. Allow the unwholesome acquaintances dwindle away,
unfed, and nurture instead relationships with people you admire.
Stuff and Nonsense:
We have too much stuff, all of us; we own far more than is sensible.
We may think we want a new sports car, or toaster, or Gucci bag, or
Chia pet, but we truly have too many items, not too few. Clutter takes
up your time and space, and encroaches on your peace of mind. You are
not the same person you were seven years ago; every cell in your body
has been replaced. You undoubtedly have things in your possession that
belonged to that old self and are no longer relevant. Start getting
rid of them. Today’s conventional rule is to toss out or give
away anything you haven’t used in the last six months. That doesn’t
always make sense. In August, should you throw out your snowboard?
Of course not. Try instead the aesthetic principle of Pre-Raphaelite
artist William Morris:
"If you want a golden rule that will fit everybody,
this is it: Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be
useful,
or believe to be beautiful."
Face reality: if the garden gnome is neither useful
nor beautiful, let it go. Someone else may find it useful or believe
it to be beautiful.
If you do not have the stamina for a yard sale, pick up the phone and
call a charity, one that will send a truck to your house. When they
ask what you are donating, say “clothing and household goods,” and
give them a specific number or bags or boxes. I like five. You may
choose more or fewer, depending on your accumulation problem. They
will give you a date. Mark your calendar. You are now obligated to
fill those bags by that date and set them out for pick-up. The benefits:
room to breathe in your home, freedom from old associations (the sweater
your ex-boyfriend gave you), and the satisfaction of giving to a good
cause.
Take stock of your how you have been spending yourself: your time,
your income, your attention. These are precious resources, not to be
squandered. Cutting back on inessentials will help the truly important
branches of your life to grow and flourish. A little judicious pruning
will allow you to reap benefits of time, space and contentment throughout
the year to come, as you cultivate your own talents and appreciate
simple joys.
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